You’ll discover that genuine confidence has absolutely nothing to do with comparing yourself to others or striving for a higher status; it’s an internal state that allows you to treat everyone the same. You'll learn the surprisingly effective way to build confidence: by becoming totally okay with the possibility of social injury, like embarrassment or judgment, rather than letting fear hold you back. You're invited to adopt a powerful worldview where you fundamentally believe that 'things are generally going to work out fine,' which radically changes how you approach challenges and interact with the world. You’ll explore the transformative power of radical self-forgiveness, realizing that letting go of past shame and guilt is a key to unlocking deep, unshakeable confidence. confidence has nothing to do with anyone else. It's not about anybody else. It's about me. The fastest way to develop confidence is to develop a comfort with the possibility of social injury. What is identified as the biggest mistake people make when thinking about confidence? According to the speaker, what is true confidence primarily about? What is 'social injury' mainly defined as in the context of developing confidence? What is the third pathway to developing confidence mentioned by the speaker? The speaker uses the movie 'Catch Me If You Can' to illustrate that confidence: You’ll learn how simple body positioning, like not facing someone head-on, can instantly make them feel safer and more at ease, a trick even the Old West understood to prevent conflict. You’ll discover that your words are far less important than your non-verbal cues because our primal mammalian brain reacts to body language first, often overriding anything you say. You'll find out how simply showing open palms, especially at naval height, can make people instantly trust and believe you, a powerful non-verbal signal called the 'truth plane.' You’ll understand that true confidence isn't about faking it for ego, but about possessing a calm demeanor that's so genuine, it actually becomes contagious and empowers those around you. You'll pick up on how intentional hand gestures can subtly reinforce your words, like bringing your hands together when you say 'connection,' making your message more impactful. You’ll realize that genuine authority isn't about controlling others, but mastering yourself — this inner control profoundly influences others on a primal level, far beyond any words you might utter. You’ll learn that the ancient mammalian part of your brain, not your logical cortex, is actually making most of your important decisions, especially emotionally driven ones. You’ll discover the four crucial elements that truly influence human behavior: getting someone's focus, establishing your authority, tapping into their tribal instincts, and engaging their emotions. my ability to make another person comfortable is non--verbal 90% non-verbal so it's how am I approaching that person so making someone comfortable and making someone trust you about the same thing if you're speaking with your arms and hands at naval height so like even with your belly button and your palms open when you're making these important points in what you're saying, people are like 10x more likely to believe you and trust you and trust in what you say just by having these open palms What is the primary reason people's brains react competitively when facing someone head-on? According to the speaker, what percentage of a person's ability to make others comfortable is non-verbal? What specific non-verbal cue is recommended to increase trust and belief in what you say by 10x? What is the key difference between genuine confidence and artificial confidence in influencing others? What are the four key factors that influence the mammalian brain, according to the speaker? You’ll dive deep into 'identity agreements,' discovering how getting someone to internally or verbally agree to 'I am the type of person who...' is a powerful way to shape their actions. The speaker shows you how subtle language, like making general observations rather than direct compliments, can lead someone to naturally align with a desired identity without feeling manipulated. You’ll grasp the concept of 'priming,' which is all about subtly setting the stage and planting ideas in someone's mind to guide them towards a specific outcome, like that fascinating study about how words can literally slow people down. And it’s not just about the words; you’ll realize that having confidence and authority is the absolute foundation that makes all these influencing techniques truly effective. I got you to agree to an identity and identity is the strongest way to influence a human being to get them to agree to who they are as a person. The base of that pyramid, the base of whether or not I accomplish, what I want to do is going to be a, a result of, do I have authority? Do I have, uh, enough confidence and, and presence to get that thing done? What is the first step the speaker recommends for getting what you want out of an interaction? According to the speaker, why are identity agreements a powerful way to influence someone? What technique involves talking negatively about a certain group of people to make someone mentally dissociate from that group and align with a desired identity? What is the main purpose of 'priming' in a conversation? What two qualities does the speaker state are the 'base of that pyramid' for successfully implementing influence techniques? You’ll discover that before any fancy words, the real magic of persuasion starts with simply grabbing and holding someone’s attention – if you can't do that, even the best scripts fall flat. You’ll learn about 'Milton statements' and 'embedded commands,' which are clever ways to paint vivid pictures in someone's mind or subtly suggest ideas by pausing or structuring your sentences. You’ll see how even simple gestures and being a bit ambiguous with your language can significantly amplify your message and make hidden commands even more potent. Most importantly, you’ll grasp that these linguistic tricks are just tools; they truly shine only when you back them up with genuine confidence, authority, and belief in what you’re saying – without that, they’re just empty words. So if I'm communicating in a way that is vivid, then I'm painting pictures in your head, which means that the mammal part of your brain can understand it. They have to be paired with confidence authority and and leadership and a true belief in what you're saying and self-esteem... they're not that effective unless you're using them in a really, I would say a really confident way. What is the primary purpose of using 'Milton statements' in linguistic persuasion, according to the speaker? According to the speaker, what is a crucial rule for an effective 'embedded command'? What does the speaker emphasize as essential for linguistic techniques like embedded commands to be truly effective? What part of the brain does vivid communication aim to reach for better understanding, according to the speaker? What is a common mistake people make when using embedded commands? You’ll discover that trying to mirror someone's body language won't make them like you; instead, mirroring is a natural sign that people already like each other, which totally flips the script on what you might have thought! This clip really gets you thinking about how we often chase the outward 'symptoms' of things like confidence or mindfulness instead of focusing on the deeper 'causes' that truly create them. You'll learn that matching someone's emotional state or mental focus is far more powerful in building connection than just copying their physical movements, which is a game-changer for how you interact. The speaker reveals that your own self-mastery — understanding yourself and being truly composed — is the heaviest lifting, accounting for 95% of your success in interactions, making those 'cool tricks' a very small part of the equation. So what that means is mirroring is a symptom of people liking each other. the best thing to mirror is like if a person's relaxed I'll be relaxed if they're attentive and focused I'll be attentive and focused i want to mirror the mammal not this not the body likewhere are they mentally What does the speaker primarily argue about the relationship between mirroring and liking? According to the speaker, what is the most effective aspect to 'mirror' in another person for genuine connection? What percentage of 'heavy lifting' in building rapport and confidence does the speaker attribute to self-composure and confidence, rather than 'cool tricks'? The speaker criticizes a common societal tendency to focus on 'symptoms' rather than 'causes.' What term does he use to describe this focus? What are the three core reasons for failure in human interactions, as outlined in the speaker's 'failure triangle'? You’ll discover a surprising truth about interrogations: kindness is actually far more effective than torture, which goes against what many might think! You’ll learn about the clever 'bait question,' designed to subtly get someone to admit presence at a scene without directly asking, making it hard to deny later. The speaker reveals a fascinating trick called the 'punishment question,' where asking a suspect what should happen to the person who committed the crime can reveal their guilt or innocence based on their suggested leniency. You’ll get an inside look at the powerful 'monologue' technique, which uses a combination of socializing, minimizing, rationalizing, and projecting blame to gently guide someone towards a confession, making it feel like their only logical option. Every interrogation system that's taught that I'm aware of in the world uh, is a derivative of the work of Hans Sharf. Is there any reason at all that one of the neighbors or a couple of the neighbors would say that they saw your vehicle outside of Nicole's house last night. Based on the text, what is the most effective approach for interrogations? What is the primary purpose of the 'bait question' in an interrogation? How does the 'punishment question' help an interrogator differentiate between guilty and innocent people? What is the overarching goal of the 'monologue' phase in an interrogation? According to the speaker, can the described interrogation methods lead to false confessions? You'll discover a brilliant tactic for navigating conversations with high-ego individuals: instead of complimenting them, you can strategically ask for their advice, framing it around their perceived strengths. This clip shows you how asking for advice subtly shifts their mindset, making them temporarily agree not to be the boastful person, effectively giving them a 'not that person' identity in your interaction. You'll learn about immediate non-verbal cues that can make others instinctively dislike you, such as facing someone head-on too closely or speaking in an unsuited tone for the environment. The speaker also highlights how associating with someone who doesn't conform to a group's unspoken rules can lead to you being perceived as an 'outcast' by extension. I think the best way to deal with that is to ask them that exact piece of advice. You use what they say about themselves to say This is why you're perfect to answer this question and the moment because they're going to give you advice... they're making that subconscious agreement that i am not that person According to the speaker, what is the best way to deal with high-ego individuals who reject compliments? When asking a high-ego person for advice, what social pressure should you specifically avoid applying? What is the primary subconscious effect on a high-ego person when they give advice using the suggested strategy? Which body language cue is mentioned as a fast way to make people dislike you or feel uncomfortable? Besides body language, what auditory cue is mentioned that can make people automatically perceive you as 'different' or 'not part of the tribe'?